Another Letter
Yo,
Morning girl,
I admit I was abit unhappy when you smsed me yesterday. Mayb it was the way you phrased your sms or something. You said it like “since you are tired, then I will be going out”. Well… you are right about one thing, and that is I thought that it would have been an excellent opportunity to have dinner and along with that a nice chat. Nowadays I have been talking so much more to the THOC people then to my own girlfriend and I dun like that at all. Here I am staying in your room and the only time I see you is when I wake up (and you are sleeping) and when I sleep (and you are sleeping). I miss you not really in a way that requires visual stimulation but in the “talking to you” and “having eye contact with you” sense, if you know what I mean. I would be lying if I said I was unhappy but believe me when I say I also realized at the same time that you need time with friends as well as some time to be outside the confines of the hostel. I respected that and hence I did not push the matter further.
When I say we “lack communication”, in actual fact I mean “I miss you so damn much”. I dun think we lack communication cos I find we can talk really well. I don’t need to hide anything from you and I really hope the feeling is mutual. One things for sure though, I don’t really like only seeing you when I wake up and when I’m about to sleep only. This period of rag and orientation really sucks actually. I want to spend more time with you but both our schedules aren’t really that complementing. I actually preferred the days when there was school curriculum.
Actually, no fuss required since really we see each other quite frequently. To explain your missing me even when I’m there sleeping before your very eyes, it’s simple. I wasn’t looking at you, I wasn’t talking to you, I wasn’t touching you. Nothing to it actually, just that it has been like this for some time. Some time maybe not to you but definitely to me. I miss you. And yes even when you are just sleeping next to me snoring.
One this is pricking me actually and I thought that you might be interested to know. You dun sms me when you are out with your friends. Do you know that you have someone waiting for you who might be worried when it’s close to midnight and his girlfriend is not back yet and not even a word from her? I dun think you even considered that possibility. You are just not the sort who would. Well… I will have to leave with that.
How come I am slowly experiencing anger whilst typing this letter? This I do not understand. I have to slowly analyze this aspect of myself. I was feeling rather neutral whilst beginning this composition but I guess my feelings gradually surfaced. My immediate hypothesis at this moment is that I have feelings hidden, or rather, which did not have the opportunity to surface, i.e. no chance to talk to you. Do you have any such feelings I wonder? I hope you’ll let me know.
There look at me… I’m actually developing this into a paper by itself already. The fingers just can’t stop moving away when it starts typing. Am I getting lor soh? If so, I hope it’s not too serious. Sigh… next week going for reservist already and I wouldn’t be seeing you on Monday and Tuesday. I was actually so disappointed when you mentioned that your chalet is on those two days. But I know that you dun really have a say for that matter so we’ll just leave it at that. Not everything goes our way right? Just that I want to spend more time with you these few days and I dun see that enthusiasm in you. Maybe that’s why I was a little unhappy yesterday? Not too sure.
I have decided to stop typing and snuggle up to you whilst I have some time to do so. Rather do that then not having the chance to even see you later.
Loving you (still)
Alvin.
Morning girl,
I admit I was abit unhappy when you smsed me yesterday. Mayb it was the way you phrased your sms or something. You said it like “since you are tired, then I will be going out”. Well… you are right about one thing, and that is I thought that it would have been an excellent opportunity to have dinner and along with that a nice chat. Nowadays I have been talking so much more to the THOC people then to my own girlfriend and I dun like that at all. Here I am staying in your room and the only time I see you is when I wake up (and you are sleeping) and when I sleep (and you are sleeping). I miss you not really in a way that requires visual stimulation but in the “talking to you” and “having eye contact with you” sense, if you know what I mean. I would be lying if I said I was unhappy but believe me when I say I also realized at the same time that you need time with friends as well as some time to be outside the confines of the hostel. I respected that and hence I did not push the matter further.
When I say we “lack communication”, in actual fact I mean “I miss you so damn much”. I dun think we lack communication cos I find we can talk really well. I don’t need to hide anything from you and I really hope the feeling is mutual. One things for sure though, I don’t really like only seeing you when I wake up and when I’m about to sleep only. This period of rag and orientation really sucks actually. I want to spend more time with you but both our schedules aren’t really that complementing. I actually preferred the days when there was school curriculum.
Actually, no fuss required since really we see each other quite frequently. To explain your missing me even when I’m there sleeping before your very eyes, it’s simple. I wasn’t looking at you, I wasn’t talking to you, I wasn’t touching you. Nothing to it actually, just that it has been like this for some time. Some time maybe not to you but definitely to me. I miss you. And yes even when you are just sleeping next to me snoring.
One this is pricking me actually and I thought that you might be interested to know. You dun sms me when you are out with your friends. Do you know that you have someone waiting for you who might be worried when it’s close to midnight and his girlfriend is not back yet and not even a word from her? I dun think you even considered that possibility. You are just not the sort who would. Well… I will have to leave with that.
How come I am slowly experiencing anger whilst typing this letter? This I do not understand. I have to slowly analyze this aspect of myself. I was feeling rather neutral whilst beginning this composition but I guess my feelings gradually surfaced. My immediate hypothesis at this moment is that I have feelings hidden, or rather, which did not have the opportunity to surface, i.e. no chance to talk to you. Do you have any such feelings I wonder? I hope you’ll let me know.
There look at me… I’m actually developing this into a paper by itself already. The fingers just can’t stop moving away when it starts typing. Am I getting lor soh? If so, I hope it’s not too serious. Sigh… next week going for reservist already and I wouldn’t be seeing you on Monday and Tuesday. I was actually so disappointed when you mentioned that your chalet is on those two days. But I know that you dun really have a say for that matter so we’ll just leave it at that. Not everything goes our way right? Just that I want to spend more time with you these few days and I dun see that enthusiasm in you. Maybe that’s why I was a little unhappy yesterday? Not too sure.
I have decided to stop typing and snuggle up to you whilst I have some time to do so. Rather do that then not having the chance to even see you later.
Loving you (still)
Alvin.
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